Monday, June 11, 2018

Suicide or Weariness of Life.

The whole notion of pain, and how every individual experiences pain, is up for debate. We don't know how another person experiences pain - physical pain or psychic pain. Some of these clinics where assisted suicide or euthanasia is practiced, they call it 'weariness of life.'
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The whole notion of pain and how every individual, experiences pain is up for debate. We don't know how another person experiences pain-physical or psychic it "weariness of life".
Miriam Towes

Ironically the last post I did in this blog was entitled, 'Wild and Precious Life'. Why? Because in the last week, we have lost two public figures who many had connections with: Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain. We are rift with opinions on what happened. Confusion, judgement and condemnation have been among some of the most common (we'll leave the conspiracy theorists out of this one). I'm going to add a bit because I deal with this on a regular basis.

First of all, what I think suicide isn't...cowardice, courage, selfishness. So what I do think is suicide is? It's the response of someone who is in pain and who has reached a point of what to do with that pain. It is ultimately physical, psychological and spiritual. And none of us have a microscopic view into the moment of what happens when the person is there and makes the choice to stop living. I have sat with about 30-40 people when they have died. I have been with countless with others when they have struggled with the reason to live. Both when they were relatively healthy and when they were not and facing the end of their life. One thing I have learned is a weariness of life can arrive at any moment in both states of being.

The lesson for me is compassion. Compassion that they took that path, compassion for those left behind who were intimate and knew them and compassion for those who thought or felt somehow they knew them. Most of all compassion to those who are struggling not to take that path. 'The one belief I have is in the force of love with that compassion. And I'm no Pollyanna. I've lived with the weariness of life, I've even skated the edge of it a time or two.

What I will conclude with is that we don't understand the full scope of how to handle 'weariness of life'. It cannot be solved by a pill, it cannot be solved by counseling and it cannot be solved by any religion/spirituality/legal means. It will take all of these parts working together to see the whole person in need.  And to accept that despite all of this that some of us will go over the edge of weariness of life. When that moment comes may we all practice the force of compassion and love.

Because Anthony Bourdain was a huge fan....I'll share some Ramones.

Ramones, 'Needles and Pins':


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