Saturday, October 9, 2010

A Bit Blue

“Have you got any soul?" a woman asks the next afternoon. That depends, I feel like saying; some days yes, some days no. A few days ago I was right out; now I've got loads, too much, more than I can handle. I wish I could spread it a bit more evenly, I want to tell her, get a better balance, but I can't seem to get it sorted. I can see she wouldn't be interested in my internal stock control problems though, so I simply point to where I keep the soul I have, right by the exit, just next to the blues.”

Nick Hornby

It's been a bit over a week since I've gotten back to California. I've found today, sitting in a lake of quiet at home, a bit of the blues. It was a year ago today I met John and had an intensive few months before it broke apart. Then there is the issue of Mom. There is a plan afoot to drive to Michigan for the holidays the first week of December if there are no changes the next 8-9 weeks. Usually a road trip would excite me, but I'm tired and it feels like life is at an impasse.

I know things will improve again, but today my soul is tired, it senses change is coming, but that this change is coming with some pain. People keep asking me about my that most famous of blues men, Robert Johnson sang:

"....I got the crossroads blues..."

I'm at a crossroads of events in life, a bit of the blues is just natural....

Rory Block, "Crossroad Blues":

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